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lifeinsidethegrey
I wish I never would have started purging. I mean I'm sure some things other than that have affected my teeth but that's a huge one. Bathing your teeth in acid multiple times a day causes so much damage. A couple of my teeth honest to god just hurt today. I had a lot of orange juice (mimosas) so that aggravated it but I'm sitting here and crying thinking about the irreversible damage I've done. I couldn't enjoy Christmas dinner without ED thoughts not because my eating disorder really wanted in.. But because thanks to it existing last Christmas, this Christmas was painful. This post sounds like a wahh me post but the point of it is to ask you to please please stop or at least reduce the frequency of purging. I'm upset because enamel is something you can't get back. Once it's gone, it's gone. It's just another thing I gave to my eating disorder in hopes that the lies it told me would come true or that I'd die. Neither of those things happened but I'm still sitting here with the after affects. (Also we could go on and on about the heart palpitations I get but I'll leave that for a different day). #analessons #analesson : you want an eating disorder, say goodbye to your tooth enamel. And while you're at it say goodbye to everything and everyone you've ever cared about. Say goodbye to happiness and to life.. To health. Most importantly say goodbye to your soul. You just sold it to the devil.
analesson - analessons -
lifeinsidethegrey : @holly__94 Right?! I barely purged until November 2012. I mean I had tried a lot but throughout the first bout and a half with my ED I couldn't. But I figured out for the last bit of the second but went into recovery before I really used it. But this next relapse I had decided "I know how to purge now so I'm going to purge everything". Worst decision of my life. And then eventually it got to the point where I was like "hell I need to slow down" and I would make rules for myself.. One being "Do. Not. Purge. Your parents are spending thousands of dollars on your teeth do not fuck them up." But I would still purge because lo and behold.. It isn't that easy to stop. But I mean.. As far as purging extremely frequently, December and January were after everything. Then it stopped for a few weeks in attempted recovery. Then every time I binged as bulimia caught me.. Then it was about daily for 3 months. So I mean.. It was only 5-6 months of purging and I've done this? Could you imagine if I hadn't committed to recovery?! I'm sorry about your teeth.. I'm lucky that in the grande scheme of things, mine really aren't that bad. Some slightly translucent, yellowed, and a couple that really bother me, but it could definitely be worse. Anyways.. I'm blabbing. I love you. ❀
holly__94 : @lifeinsidethegrey your not blabbing, I love talking to you. Im the same. I mean I figured it out right before I was diagnosed but it was only like a last resort because I hated it SO much. Then went into recovery and forgot about it. Then when I relapsed it was laxs and purging but only a couple times a week. But my last one this year, my god I went for gold. It started in august and last like a few months, I would literally purge everything that went into me. Then started bingeing and purging even though Id never done that before. Its awful how you get so addicted to it because its so hard to stop! But I was lucky and got to the point where I was like "fuck I cant keep doing this to myself" and stopped by myself. Now Im 90 days purge free! :) my teeth are awful, they always hurt, some are loose and transparent. Its the most horrid ED behaviour for me. Something I will forever be disappointed in myself for. Ima stop rambling now! Haha xx
lifeinsidethegrey : @holly__94 That's phenomenal! Purging seems to be the last behavior (of the ones I track) that I can't kick. Cause like.. I haven't binged since June, pulled out hair since July, cut since may, taken a stupid amount of pills since June.. But I still end up purging every few months.. The last being the beginning of December. It's definitely really emotional for me too cause I'll get the urge to purge even if I haven't eaten anything when I'm upset or angry. You know? And it's probably the thing that's poses the biggest threat to me. Like if you think about it, any of the times that I'm purging.. At home or even worse at school, I'm risking stomach and esophagus ruptures, heart attacks, and god knows what else. Like I could drop dead on the bathroom floor in a puddle of my own vomit. Like Kayla stooppp! It's weird how once you're fairly far away from regular use of behaviors you realize just how risky what you were doing was. Hahah.
holly__94 : I know i said this last time but Im exactly the same. I remember being so upset once that I purged even though I hadnt eaten. And if I get overly emotional/stressed purging is the main thing apart from self harm that I go back to. Its definitely threatening to. Since I started Ive had really bad chest pains and my heart flutters and goes weird all the time. It is ironic isnt it? Like when you're doing it its like "oh one more time wont hurt blah blah blah" but when you step back and look at yourself, its so dangerous. You'll conquer it one day sweet, I dont doubt that at all πŸ’›
dontstopthefight : Mhm I understand. :( ❀️
recoveringjoce : this post makes me very sad. i've cried so many times because of the damage i'm doing to my body, but I CANT STOP. now the tears come again... :/
lifeinsidethegrey : @inthelavenderward I'm living proof that you CAN stop. It takes a while and it's the most difficult thing you can do.. You'll hate it at times and it won't go away easily but it is possible. I promise. Don't give up hope. Xoxo.
recoveringjoce : i really wish I could, but if i keep binging like this then I won't stop. πŸ˜ͺ
hrklives - chooselifewarrior - sierra_lehman - katieekupcake -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
falling in love while suffering from an eating disorder is dangerous. he will be the only thing on your mind, and forgetting to eat is against the rules
crazy_bitch_never_eats : I'm scared and worried about you :( I love you ok
maggieee5086 : it's been six weeks are you okay?
selfiegamestrong : SHE IS ALIVE, I think. Her tumblr is active!!!! :)
depressedduckling : What's her tumblr @selfiegamestrong
wishingskinnyy : @depressedduckling sweetsoapiex
wishingskinnyy : Please come back!😭
lilyanoctor : I'm worried about you
guinlor : I miss you hun
anamariiee - anorexxiaismylife - kawaiidaisies - plzthin -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
please tell me how to be happy... explain what I've got to live for. send me some hope sweethearts πŸ˜£πŸ’•
katthecreator : where have you been, we've been worried :c
eating_well_for_a_perfect_body : You need to live for the littlest and sweetest things of life. A smile, a look, a smell...a book... and you need to believe in God: he loves you so much however you are you are special to him <3 Live for the life you will have when you will be healthy: sun, see, friendship, love, fun... Good luck I'm with you! @sweetsoapiex
gore_and_glory : To feel happy you have to do things that make you happy. Eat chocolate, take long walks, hold hands with someone you love. You are what you surround yourself with, so surround yourself with happiness.
si3rrahhh : Your so beautiful. No one deserves to suffer from unhappiness. You are a survivor, that's a huge thing. If you got past anorexia, you can get past anything else. Stay strong c:
camilladanielsn : Youre so pretty stay strong β™₯
ana_bellissima_ : Beauty!
eating_well_for_a_perfect_body : Live for the little nice things, for the perfect moments...Live for the love you can feel, either if it is difficult, I know...im depressed too sometimes but LIFE CHANGES WHEN YOU START TO WANT LIFE TO CHANGE! it depends on the way you see things...live and love you are so sweet if i was there i would hug you and smile to you and bring you out to feel the sun on your skin, to feel the wind, to listen to the nature... <3 be strong, you WILL have wonderful moments, i know it...just have hope! <3
captured_by_grace : @sweetsoapiex God made UN His Image...He Created U to LIVE N Him & Love yourself 1st cause He Loves U Eternal...He wants U to B Kind to your body & Love yourself for the way UR...Don't B ashamed of how UR...But Live for Him...He makes U Strong
anorexxiaismylife - smallthingsmakeyouhappy - kawaiidaisies - oceanhaley -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
if he loved me, I would be happy πŸ˜₯ but he doesn't. I'm impossible to love.
xx_whoa_vibes_xx : I love you dear
_sofiapinto_ : Why did you break up?
julia1997xo : Dont put your happiness on someone else. Put it on youπŸ˜ƒ! People always will come and go but you have yourself, and you are great sweetheart
hannahschochler : Really? Because there are 17,000 people who love you.
carla_pickford : What about your dog?
meganforbes18 : You are beyond perfect bb! You have a dog and wonderful life given to you and THOSE are the things that love you! You should only start worrying about yourself and what makes you happy sweetpea! If baths every night help you relax and feel good then do it! If sleeping with wet hair some how clams you down then do it! If carrying snuggles around because he's your sidekick then do it! Right now it's all about yourself and getting you healthy bb
every_daze_a_holiday : Soaps, u can spend a lifetime trying to find things that make you happy..but if u can't make yourself happy first, nothing else ever will. Get yourself well girl. Love yourself for everything u stand for..and the rest will come I promise.
deifying_gravity : Your not impossible to love darling, I think you just need to love yourself more and not be so concerned with boys and being in love. You should try to focus on yourself for a while till your healthy and safe. We love you darling and can't wait for you to get better and come backπŸ’• stay strong and get healthyπŸ’•
anorexxiaismylife - oceanhaley - kawaiidaisies - plzthin -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
I stopped taking my medications two weeks ago
sofiosaurus : You want to get better don't you hun? Please start on them again, you need the help... I don't like taking meds, but I want to get better and now that is the only option I've got. Be strong β™₯
rapedandbroken : Please please please read your kik :(
ban_ednos : Please try a mealplan. When you are a bit more energetic and you don't have to think about what to eat all the time, you can tackle your depression better and maybe find some help. I really hope you do, I really care for you. I really doxxx
anxiouschameleon : Take them again. I stopped taking mine and things were bad. why don't you like them? x
sweetsoapiex : @whrecked you don't bug me sweetheart. I LOVE reading your comments so, so much πŸ’•
whrecked : Aw shucks you're so great I admire you so much, really its an honour that you even respond to them β™‘β™₯β™‘
captured_by_grace : @sweetsoapiex I've got Anxiety & Depression...I've turned to JESUS CHRIST as my meds...He is the only one that understands me when I'm down.
captured_by_grace : ..He makes me feel better about myself all the time:-) God Saved me & Loves me so much...Ask Him for Help...He's right there all the time just waiting for U to call upon Him...
gilliannn141 - lucytabz - her_lovelylife - weneedequality_ -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
drawing is the only thing that calms me down.
cinderbellea : It's beautiful keep going gorgeous
geuliet : That's stunning you are so unbelievably good at drawing!!!!
martablide : Awesome ✨
eating_well_for_a_perfect_body : This is wonderful: draw, listen some music...express yourself you are gorgeous!!! @sweetsoapiex
walkingtravesty98 : Omg (sorry for creeping you page!) This is so awesome. You're really freaking talented
captured_by_grace : @sweetsoapiex God gave U an Awesome Talent..Drawing...This is Awesome..Keep Drawing..I keep telling my granddaughter the Samething:-) She's 17 & will graduate this yr..Keep drawing dear...Sometimes she draws what she feels...
for_cutters_and_suicidals : OH MY GOD YOURE SO GOOD
for_cutters_and_suicidals : WHY DIDNT I KNOW YOU COULD DRAW LIKE THIS
carlyfarmer - anaisyourfoe - ana_take_me_away_please_ - the_stranger_is_me -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
I have a weak heart so I'm not allowed caffeine. I just drunk 2 litres of pepsi max. I feel so weak and shaky. my heart is painful. I look ill. my body is so frail at the moment. I have no energy, I sleep almost every hour of every day
mmskinny : I'm so worried for you, I hope you find a medication that works for you and all is well. I wish I could help somehow, you are so apparently strong, keep fightingπŸ’•
my_new_chapter_ : Oh darling. This makes me so sad! I'm glad to see you're back, but I'm sad to see that you're struggling to much. Sending some love and strength your way. <3
hollllowed : I'm glad you're back honey, I've been so worried. I love you millions and with all the support from everyone on here you can pick yourself right back up again!πŸŒΈπŸ’Ÿ
scabbynormal : Why do you come back after 5 weeks of not posting anything, and post things like this. Things that you know will make everyone worry. But you don't care to ask how any of us are? :/ do you not give a shit about any of us? Sorry but that's how it makes me feel.
cutter_quotess : Be strong recovery is hard but I know can do it I've see that you really are a strong person whether you know it or not, I've seen it, be strong ❀️πŸ’ͺ❀️πŸ’ͺ and be safe
arianathequeenx_ : Good luck hun <3 Recovery is hard. I wish I could do it
beckpickhardt : Life is hard omg better take a selfie
captured_by_grace : @sweetsoapiex do U take Vitamins ? Ask your mom to ask the Doctor about GERITOL...I had to take it growing up...I felt tired all the time too...
gilliannn141 - lucytabz - her_lovelylife - weneedequality_ -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
this smile is not real. I have lost who I am. I cannot trust anyone anymore. I don't know what to do. I can't post here so this will be deleted soon. follow my tumblr in my bio if you want to. I can't understand why my heart is still beating. I feel like I have suffered enough. I smile, I laugh, I'm 'better', but I'm not. I am more weightless than ever and yet my mind is heavy with depression and self hate. read this and please don't repeat it, I need somewhere that I can post about my feelings. I miss everyone. your support was the only thing that kept me fighting. hope has died
snowingsilver : you're never alone sweets. πŸ‘­
ali_luciani : I missed you. We're here for you πŸ’œ
rapedandbroken : You don't need to answer; but please read what I kik'd you :(
weyheyhello : I missed you so bad darling, my heart is breaking of seeing you so sad 😭 stay strong sugarplum i know you can πŸ’ͺ❀️
savannahfinkle : I missed you so much! please stay strong love! ❀
taniadz : I missed you so so muuuuuuch!!! @sweetsoapiex I'm worried about you! We all love you! Please enjoy your life because you are awesome babe!! πŸ˜πŸ’—πŸ’—πŸ’—
eating_well_for_a_perfect_body : YOU CAN WIN YOU CAN BE STRONG!!! i sometimes feel like you like i cannot do anything im scared about life about death about people about the world. But scare is not the truth. YOU can really LIVE LOVE BREATH AND FEEL ALIVE it s better than being alone. I sometimes feel like you like im detestable and bad and everything i do is wrong. But is not. YOU CAN BE HAPPY THERE ARE SO MANY PEOPLE THAT LOVES YOU you just need to open your eyes and heart and see it and feel it. Don't be depressed you won't gain anything from it. You have to FIGHT. Be strong YOU actually can!!! ❀️❀️❀️ @sweetsoapiex
captured_by_grace : @sweetsoapiex Honey...Turn to GOD & You'll Feel 100% Better by turning everything over to Him...He'll take your pain...all your Struggles away upon Him...You'll feel lighter...I know Sweetie...Love U & So Does JESUS...
lucytabz - the_stranger_is_me - ana_take_me_away_please_ - eating_well_for_a_perfect_body -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
I stayed in bed all day until 6pm... I'm a fat failure. I can't cope anymore... I don't know what I'm doing. I don't want to struggle anymore...
youre_a_survivor : Love you baby. Come back to Instagram?
_abbi_hayden_ : Hope to see you again, wishing the best for you! I love you so much and I will always have a thought about you in my mind.
elladyness : She's okay! Calm down guys <3
_andrea_x333 : U r not fat 0_0 ur really skinny
fitspirationgram : Ur so thin
onceuponarebel : You,are perfect!
masia669 : The cure is to get to people, find a passion, travel.
masia669 : Do not be so focused on your body. You are a soul, not your body. If you are fighting with fear watch Bashar videos or Osho or Eckhart Tole or Sadhguru videos or Infinite Waters, they helped me.
xxhannahmitchxx - thinordeath - fluffysadkitty - pasmakinakatya -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
I'm trying to ignore my depressed and suicidal feelings... I went to lewes bonfire night with my boyfriend to try and focus on something else... it was so cold so I wore 7 layers (three thermal tshirts, two jumpers, a jacket and a coat) so I looked huge. I wanted to cry the entire evening but I'm glad I made some beautiful memories with my boyfriend πŸ˜£πŸ’•πŸŒΈ
megaredhead180 : @sweetsoapie you deserve love and I am so happy for you that you have found someone so beautiful!
melanieedgg : You two are adorable! πŸ’œ
emoti0nal_wreck : Hope you're okay love ~
darktragedy : You look so happy remember those moments please @sweetsoapie
learningaboutlindsay : Awe!!!!!!
guinlor : This is so cute awh!!
tigerstripes4ever : Awwww ^β€’^ this looks so cute! I hope you're okay bc you haven't posted for long :(
eating_well_for_a_perfect_body : You made it right!!!
anorexxiaismylife - mathers_crew - lucytabz - iseldomgiveashit -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
I have to smile. if I start crying, then I won't be able to stop. I have an ocean of sadness behind my eyelids threatening to flood. if I'm upset then I cause a problem. I just act as "happy sophie" so no one else realises and shouts at me. I'm happy, I'm happy, I'm happy... (maybe if I keep repeating that then i'll start believing it?)
quetiapinum : I love your eyes xx
xo_laurenx_xo : Your really pretty oh my gosh I just you so pretty I can't even its just. Wow
guinlor : You're beautiful!
xxsadeyes : You are so beautiful... stay strong!
lucy_ana_ed : You are beautiful! How tall are you?:))
skinnyoblivion : you're so lovely god your eyes are beautiful darling🌸
captured_by_grace : @sweetsoapiex Quit feeling this way Sweetie...You're a Beautiful girl:-) You'll Feel alot Better about yourself when U quit feeling down...Think Positive all the time..REBUKE that Negative energy out & Replace it with Positive energy...Once
captured_by_grace : U do that...You'll start to feel Great & Energerized...
catslovemoney - lucytabz - piercethesamantha - weneedequality_ -
instagram
thinnsmokes_
With one strike of a comb .. 😞
ananarecovery - analesson - ana - mialesson - bulimia - thissucks - ineedrecovery - eatingdisorder - edrecovery - anorexic - eatingdisordernototherwisespecified - anorexia - edsoldiers - ednosrecovery - edlesson - mia - eatingdisorderrecovery - edfighter - ednos - edsoldier - edfighters - miarecovery -
thinnsmokes_ : #eatingdisorder#ednos#bulimia#bulimia#mia#anorexia#anorexic#ana#eatingdisordernototherwisespecified#analesson#mialesson#edlesson#edsoldier#edsoldiers#edfighter#edfighters#ednosrecovery#edrecovery#eatingdisorderrecovery#ineedrecovery#ananarecovery#miarecovery#thissucks
complete_chaos93 : Take biotin. It's really good for your hair
thinnsmokes_ : @victim_of_the_night13 I'll try it. :) Thank you.
xxradicalx - shefeelsfine - giuliafallenapart -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
"soapie only had 2 hours of sleep last night so she is very tired today... I just want to lick her face and give her a kiss." γƒΌ snuggles πŸΆπŸ’•
beautiful - me - fashion - love - ana - tired - selfharmmm - ed - bulimia - pug - selfinjury - fat - sad - hair - anorexiarecovery - eatingdisorder - girl - edrecovery - anorexia - edsoldiers - anarecovery - recovery - mia - eatingdisorderrecovery - analesson - ednos - depressed - blithe - thin - skinny -
nattaliicious : Such a cutie!😍
imstruggling_ : Im coming to steal that pug OMG 😍😍
sophie_melissa : I love snuggles ❀️
iwantperfection00 : πŸΆπŸ’•
_ellsxo : AwwwπŸ’—
guinlor : The cutest dog I have ever seen
learning2recover : Awwhh adorable my dog is a pug cross πŸ’ž πŸ’ž
___sushiza : πŸ’•πŸ™ˆβœ¨πŸ™ˆπŸ’•
gilliannn141 - lucytabz - emmythebeluga - piercethesamantha -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
this is me before I developed my eating disorder. 11 and a half stone (154lbs) of fat. I was a hideous lump that had a breakdown every day. I couldn't cope with anything
loudubinmelb : Has anything changed did loosing all the weight help? To a point probably then u went to far
marissa_explainsitall : I had always been under weight (sever asthma and strong medicine/always being sick) until I went vegan at 16. It ruined my metabolism for some reason and I went from about 107 to 170lbs in less then two years. I had gained some popularity in town and everyone was mean to me. I got emailed constantly about how fat and ugly I was. It eventually pushed me over the edge and I just fell into anorexia (I had the basic set up for an eating disorder from my parents divorce so it wasn't much if a jump). My longest fast was 28 days - I started getting insane. I lost 65lbs in about 3 months. I am 5'7" and got down to about 105lbs before anyone said anything. It was really seeing the impact my drastic and sudden weight loss had on my grandmother that made me really realize that maybe I should get help. I've been recovering for almost two years and it is still a struggle every day. It is not an easy road but you don't wake up tired or have dreams of binging after a while. Your energy will come back and curves will form. It is a very long road that will test you at times but you will find other things will occupy your mind soon enough and things will get easier. Just hang in there, we all know you can do it.
sofcking_heartless : That was so inspiring honestly ! πŸ’• @marissa_explainsitall
naviee : Omg you looked so beautiful
maevekirkpatrick : You are absolutely gorgeous <3
diary_of_skelotons : You were beautifull then and now. Oh darling I whish I would magically make you happy
helptostopbullying : You were so beautiful. And you know what? You still are . You're perfect. I love you so much. Stay strong babe. Don't leave. You're so important to many people. We love you and need you.
thepixieprincesa : Gorgeous
carlyfarmer - lucytabz - penny_lane8724 - piercethesamantha -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
are any of you sugarplums interested in seeing photos of me before my eating disorder? πŸ˜ΆπŸ’œβ„
_queenofcydonia_ : Yes!
cookies_weightloss : yes!!
eviercukor : YES
dinoxiren : Of course c:
melanieedgg : Yes! I'm sure you were beautiful as always!
fallenangelinheaven : Yeah <3
caroelee : post more
wannaloosesomeweight : yes!!!
tinylilhobo - loveskinnyy1 - hahaoops_loveyou - emmythebeluga -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
snuggles dressed up as a bumblebee when he was a little baby πŸ˜‹πŸ˜πŸ˜†πŸ™ˆπŸ’•πŸΆπŸ’—
beautiful - me - fashion - love - ana - tired - selfharmmm - ed - bulimia - pug - selfinjury - fat - sad - hair - anorexiarecovery - eatingdisorder - girl - edrecovery - anorexia - edsoldiers - anarecovery - recovery - mia - eatingdisorderrecovery - analesson - ednos - depressed - blithe - thin - skinny -
martablide : Ooooooo😍 omgπŸ’•πŸ’•πŸ˜—
thempuff : Thats so cute πŸ˜πŸŒΈπŸ’•πŸ
ansleynewman : that made my day
pmcdaniel12 : My puppy Alice was a bumble bee on her first Halloween!
demiejade : Hey beautiful, just wanted to ask if your pug malts/shreds alot? Someone told me they don't but others have said you find their hair everywhere.. Hope you can help :) I think you're amazing btw, I know the struggle you go through and I'm here if you ever need anyone πŸ’•πŸŒΈπŸΆ
leannesrecovery : Seriously the cutest thing EVER😊❀️
jessica_likes_your_post : I just wanna squeeze em!
_grace_dancer_ : OMG so cute
_grace_dancer_ - gilliannn141 - emmythebeluga - johnlbrummitt -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
watching a concert with my boyfriend. I'm cuddled in his arms πŸ˜‹πŸ’•πŸŒΈ
beautiful - me - fashion - love - ana - tired - selfharmmm - ed - bulimia - pug - selfinjury - fat - sad - hair - anorexiarecovery - eatingdisorder - girl - edrecovery - anorexia - edsoldiers - anarecovery - recovery - mia - eatingdisorderrecovery - analesson - ednos - depressed - blithe - thin - skinny -
finding_happiness__ : This is perfect omgπŸ˜‹πŸ’•
laurwar : :) what concert?
sweetsoapiex : @laurwar biffy clyro at reading! πŸ˜πŸ’•
laurwar : @sweetsoapie never heard of them, but I have now! I'm gonna check them out thanks! :)
r_tothin : Biffy! πŸ’•πŸ’•
uponadream_ : Biffy clyro!!!
_queenofcydonia_ : That was an awesome concert! I watched it with my bestie over facebook and i was singing all the words!!
moonbrightonline : Hey sweet!☺ You should check out jewellery out as we think you'd really like it!πŸ™ˆ Since we're new we were just wondering if tree was any chance of a shout out as we cannot afford promotors right now! We understand that it's not everyone's cup of tea but we would honestly appreciate it soooo much! Thank you for taking your time to read this!πŸ’•
tinylilhobo - scoutingforfood - loveskinnyy1 - princess__oliviaa -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
I died my hair pastel lilac last year, I wanted to look like a different person πŸ™ˆπŸ’œ it was so much fun
tears_of_joy1999 : you should dye your hair a soft, pastel pink colour! that would be so cute!
freya_fights : You look so tall!! O: how tall are you?? xx (I love the outfit btw)
bellamy_cate_ : You are so beautiful
thefutondimension : How tall are you? You look really tall but sometimes pictures are misleading. Like 5'8-9?
tinaknoxxx : I hate pro Ana's. And those who say this is "perfection" you're dying, dying is not beautiful..you were truly beautiful before the disorder grabbed ahold of you. But I have faith that you'll over come this. Stay strong. Here for you xx
heytamhey : She is recovering @tinaknoxxx
skinnylooker : Not bad.
bepay : I used to follow your account, I used to want to be like you. Thin and beautiful but then I learned that I am my own beautiful. It's really sad to look back on people you used to admire and still see their weakness. I wish you the best of luck with your eating disorder, fight that demon baby girl! You are a strong, courageous and an inspiring figure to us all! We love you! Stay strong πŸ’•πŸ’•πŸ’•
lisafrc - mrsyuliaswell - chidinista - itsahippiethang -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
I threw my πŸ”ͺ in the bin and went to bed instead πŸŒ™β­πŸ’«πŸ’€πŸ’— I'm feeling like a failure at the moment because I keep having the urges to hurt myself. I'm still not recovering. I'm pretty pathetic
ana_claims_me : I'm serious . You are extremely pretty !! I am so jealous ! Well done , lovely . You're not pathetic at all .
elladyness : I'm so proud of you Sophie I'm crying OMG I love you so much πŸ’•πŸŒΈπŸ’•πŸŒΈπŸ’•πŸŒΈπŸ’•πŸŒΈπŸ’•πŸŒΈ
my_lovely_secret : wow we're all so proud of you β™‘ I hope you'll feel better soon, stay strong cutie :3
__nickii : Your so gorgeous ❀️
missybeans666 : I'm so proud of you darling πŸ’•
juliaa_redheadd : totally random comment, but you look so much like Jenna Marbles to me.
tostaysane : You're so pretty Soapie❀️❀️
guinlor : I'm so proud. Stay strong sweetie.
loveskinnyy1 - scoutingforfood - ninaadanielle -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
I baked vanilla cupcakes with my little brother πŸ˜‹πŸ™ˆπŸ° so much sugar and butter though! πŸ˜£πŸ’•πŸ’—πŸΆ
beautiful - me - fashion - love - ana - tired - selfharmmm - ed - bulimia - pug - selfinjury - fat - sad - hair - anorexiarecovery - eatingdisorder - girl - edrecovery - anorexia - edsoldiers - anarecovery - recovery - mia - eatingdisorderrecovery - analesson - ednos - depressed - blithe - thin - skinny -
sxphiecharlxtte : Okay have fun β™₯
smelimeli3 : How's lily?
sweetsoapiex : #anorexia #recovery #anorexiarecovery #ana #anarecovery #ed #edrecovery #edsoldiers #eatingdisorderrecovery #eatingdisorder #sad #me #mia #bulimia #ednos #fat #analesson #girl #pug #selfharmmm #selfinjury #thin #skinny #tired #beautiful #hair #blithe #depressed #love #fashion
victoriawilke : 😍😍😍😍
_madisonporter_ : Who gives a fuck if there's sugar and butter in them?! That's what they have in them!! * attention seeker *
princess__oliviaa : Whats wrong with you.. @_madisonporter_
calettedosio : What the fuck? @_madisonporter_
vanillium : @_madisonporter_ rude.😀
pleasekissthepainaway - loveskinnyy1 - scoutingforfood - pasmakinakatya -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
I fell asleep on the sofa with snuggles earlier. my mum took this photo of us πŸ™ˆπŸΆπŸ’• today has been awful and I failed at a lot of things. but I'm trying to be positive πŸ˜πŸ’—β­οΈ
beautiful - me - fashion - love - ana - tired - selfharmmm - ed - bulimia - pug - selfinjury - fat - sad - hair - anorexiarecovery - eatingdisorder - girl - edrecovery - anorexia - edsoldiers - anarecovery - recovery - mia - eatingdisorderrecovery - analesson - ednos - depressed - blithe - thin - skinny -
wantingbeautiful : Awwe
youthnomxre : aw! So sweet.
_maldimiele_ : Stay strong love!<3
fragilespines : seriously, you two >
victoriawilke : awwww omg
sweetsoapiex : @fragilespines that's just made my evening 😍
zinotchka : Cute
alittlebitskinnier : it's like you both are soulmates πŸ™Š
triggermeskinny - loveskinnyy1 - scoutingforfood - pasmakinakatya -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
am I ever going to be happy? when did everyone realise they were happy? 🌸
fa_lilianne : @sweetsoapie i have never post something on your ig but i feel bad because i remember having all those feelings you have, and its really not worth it! You dont have to lose something you love to realize how wonderful life is! I'm skinny fat for real a year ago i was with 14.5 kg more but i lost it in a healthy way, i swear i will never come back to the ed life! My father died a few years ago and if you now how hard is to live without him, how hard is for my mom, that just made me rethink and start the amazing life we all have to have!! For him! For my mom! For me! I will not tell u is easy, i made bad comments abt myself i get desperate sometimea abt my look! But! I am stronger than the ed! I'm worth to live a happy and healthy lifestyle surrounded by all the people i love the most! And so can be you! You can be happy! You dont need to live something as bad as me to understand how amazing is to live! There always be bad days but you dont have to make everyday a bad day! Sorry my bad english i'm from mexico!! And sorry for the big letter! I just felt i have to tell you this so you can follow a new and better way! I'll cheer u up till you get better! If you need someone to talk here i am! ☺ xoxo my dear! And fight! πŸ’ͺ😊
sweetsoapiex : @silent_healing she's here now, but she isn't interested in opening the cards or reading the poems I wrote for her. she's tired
christina__michelle : Remember happy comes in moments. A lot of us forget that. It doesn't mean you're happy all the time. It simply means you've decided to let yourself enjoy the positive moments in you're life. Instead of creating and dwelling on the more negative moments for yourself when you are worth SO MUCH MORE THAN THAT! πŸ’— I realized this after starting recovery & it's making a big difference. You will get there. Let yourself be in the now. When you do something nice it's ok to let yourself enjoy it. And when when something negative happens, just notice it and let it pass. That's mindfulness. πŸ’œ stay strong sweetheart. It's going to be ok!
eatpurgecry : I wish we lived in the same places❀️ I think we could be great friends
crystalwaters12 : Happiness is about making the choice to be happy. Looking for and seeing the upside in every situation. Gratitude. When you're in a bad situation list as many things as you can that you're grateful for. Make it a habit. Sometimes my list includes: breathing, being alive, and there being a tomorrow.
feebeedrury : When I began to eat more, it seems impossible but then you get to that point and its like you see the world so might brighter xx
just_broken_me : Hope this helps a bit, sorry it was so long πŸ’•πŸ’“πŸ’•
vegankitchentable : What an adorable duo πŸ˜πŸΆπŸŽ€
charlotteoohps - loveskinnyy1 - scoutingforfood - emmythebeluga -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
snuggles is trying to teach me to eat healthy! today we had some lettuce together πŸ˜‹πŸΆπŸ™ˆπŸ’šπŸ’• what other things should I try to eat? 🐰🌸
kennedylynn__22 : Do pugs shed? @sweetsoapie
sweetsoapiex : @kennedylynn__22 snuggles does shed, but only the soft fluff on the bottom of his butt, not his entire coat. it's kind of cute. you can gently pull it out with your fingers, and he loves it. he plays with the little pieces of fluff. apart from that he doesn't shed so he's quite a neat and tidy little dog πŸ˜‹πŸ’•πŸΆπŸŒΈ
kennedylynn__22 : @sweetsoapie aw! So cute. I wanna get a dog and you've made me obsessed with pugs haha I have a Maltese and they do not shed which is nice so I thought I would see if snuggles shed😊but it doesn't seem like she does much which would be a perfect dog breed! Pugs are so cute!
kennedylynn__22 : He***!!!
xxwillowtreexx : Your pug is seriously the cutest pug I've seen in my life.
pauliii97 : Fruits, vegetables, bread, pasta, tofu, ... :**
fatsnomore : @denauly OMG LOOK AT THIS PUG!!
onceuponarebel : Aww
triggermeskinny - charlotteoohps - loveskinnyy1 - onceuponarebel -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
my little sister is supposed to be coming home tonight. I haven't seen her in months. I attached a piece of string from one end of her room to the other, so it hangs in the air. then I pegged: cards, poems I wrote, letters, soft toys, matching best friend jewellery and a little angel. hopefully this will make her smile. I've missed her so much πŸ˜”πŸ’•
sweetsoapiex : she came home.... she's not interested in opening the cards or reading the poems because she's tired...
sweetsoapiex : @caitlynjaydee I know she's having a bad time at the moment, she's trying to run away from everything that's hurting her, but I put lots of effort in and I feel a little disappointed. I mean, I understand if she's tired and wants to open them tomorrow. I need to just stop thinking about myself. I guess I'm being selfish.
caitlynjaydee : @sweetsoapie still no excuse. Did she even say thankyou or acknowledge how much hard work you would have gone to to do something like that for her.
sweetsoapiex : @caitlynjaydee no she hasn't but maybe she's just waiting until tomorrow to say thankyou. I don't know πŸ˜£πŸ’•
_vafrous : Be patient love, give her time to get back into her room and adjust to the environment again. πŸ’ž
ana_claims_me : That's so sweet .
veggie_bean : Give her time. She's your sister and trust me, that means she can't stay mad at you forever x @sweetsoapie
imfading : Eminem omg c: and thats so sweet
triggermeskinny - charlotteoohps - keleigh_cheyanne - scoutingforfood -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
this is my new bunny. I don't know what to name him? I am so lonely. I have no-one. my depression is uncontrollable... I'm crying, unhappy, exhausted. I don't want to be here anymore. I'm a pointless worthless waste of space.
my_ana_life14 : Call your bf sweety❀️
glitzervodka_ : Same here 😞❀️
gina_jewell : Cuddles so him and snuggles can't comfort you hehe stay strong xoxo
sweetsoapiex : @my_ana_life I can't 😞 he's having a sports evening with his male friends and I don't want to ruin for him πŸ˜£πŸ’•
callmecorinne : @sweetsoapie love you so so much. God that sounds like the perfect evening! 😘😘❀️❀️ thank you so much for the special message it made me smile. 😊
yahairamendes : You're Perfect <3
justfeatherss : omg i have the same iphone case! πŸ˜±πŸ’• #twinning
chloemyaa : @im_a_unicornn_
charlotteoohps - loveskinnyy1 - scoutingforfood - onceuponarebel -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
chocolate buttons and honeycomb nuggets πŸ˜πŸ™ˆπŸ’— (I didn't have a bag so I put them into one of snuggles clean, empty and never used poop bags hahahaha) πŸ’©πŸ˜πŸ’•β­οΈ
beautiful - me - fashion - love - ana - tired - selfharmmm - ed - bulimia - pug - selfinjury - fat - sad - hair - anorexiarecovery - eatingdisorder - girl - edrecovery - anorexia - edsoldiers - anarecovery - recovery - mia - eatingdisorderrecovery - analesson - ednos - depressed - blithe - thin - skinny -
sweetsoapiex : @kittycatgirl44 I'm not sure the serving size, but these are cadburys chocolate buttons and galaxy crunchie rocks. I took the idea from the cheese died on 'the devil wears prada' where emily eats a square of cheese when she feels faint. Instead I eat some chocolate hehe πŸ˜†πŸ’•πŸΆ
calabasasgirll : @sweetsoapie yumm!!!!!!
silent_destruction : Omh haha :p give me some!! 😜
sweetsoapiex : @kittycatgirl44 cheese diet*
gaarabloodymonday : i want
flyondreamongoon : Hahaha that's such a great idea, perfect for movie theaters too:)
_piercethemiceofthehorizon_ : Yumm 😍
belomst : I love that you felt you needed to point out it was a unused poo bag, ahaha!!
tinylilhobo - loveskinnyy1 - _5boysstolemyheart - cherryglossish -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
he's quite possibly the weirdest pug in the world πŸ˜›πŸΆπŸ’• I'm going out for lunch today with my mum and little brother, wish me luck! πŸ™ˆπŸ˜…πŸ’—β­οΈ
beautiful - me - fashion - love - ana - tired - selfharmmm - ed - bulimia - pug - selfinjury - fat - sad - hair - anorexiarecovery - eatingdisorder - girl - edrecovery - anorexia - edsoldiers - anarecovery - recovery - mia - eatingdisorderrecovery - analesson - ednos - depressed - blithe - thin - skinny -
diagnonsense : Good luck πŸ’•
sweetsoapiex : #anorexia #recovery #anorexiarecovery #ana #anarecovery #ed #edrecovery #edsoldiers #eatingdisorderrecovery #eatingdisorder #sad #me #mia #bulimia #ednos #fat #analesson #girl #pug #selfharmmm #selfinjury #thin #skinny #tired #beautiful #hair #blithe #depressed #love #fashion
queenofultraviolence : Good luck honey <3
_katiesrecovery_ : Good luck gorgeous girl !❀❀ I hope you have a fantastic time πŸ˜˜πŸ’• @sweetsoapie
thelifeofmary_ : Good luck! You'll be fine!
dizzy_izzy1002 : Good luck! Even though you dont need it, you'll be fine! Have a great time sweetie! <3
allyisnthere : Ugh! Snuggles is so freakin cute! (:
martablide : So adorable❀
starving_myself_to_death - diaryofeatingdisorder - kykykryptonite - pasmakinakatya -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
when does hibernation begin because I am 100% participating in that πŸ˜‹πŸ’•
beautiful - me - fashion - love - ana - tired - selfharmmm - ed - bulimia - pug - selfinjury - fat - sad - hair - anorexiarecovery - eatingdisorder - girl - edrecovery - anorexia - edsoldiers - anarecovery - recovery - mia - eatingdisorderrecovery - analesson - ednos - depressed - blithe - thin - skinny -
sweetsoapiex : #anorexia #recovery #anorexiarecovery #ana #anarecovery #ed #edrecovery #edsoldiers #eatingdisorderrecovery #eatingdisorder #sad #me #mia #bulimia #ednos #fat #analesson #girl #pug #selfharmmm #selfinjury #thin #skinny #tired #beautiful #hair #blithe #depressed #love #fashion
gaarabloodymonday : pretty bed covers <3
sweetsoapiex : @gaarabloodymonday they're pug bed covers πŸ˜‹πŸ’•πŸΆ
shutupanddancewithme : I would too if i didn't have a child.......
rachelbieber_ : Awh😍 your sheets are so amazing
agn77 - loveskinnyy1 - misty_da - pasmakinakatya -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
when I get lonely, I draw. I have hundreds of sheets of paper where my soul has bled ink and used it to form images βœπŸ£πŸ’•
thelifeofmary_ : Oh my! I never knew you could draw like this! I never knew you LIKED drawing! You're soooooo talented! Wow! πŸ’•πŸŒΈπŸ˜‹
queenofultraviolence : This is just so fucking amazing
kailadblackburn : Wow, this is truly amazing
julialundbergish : i could totally see that was onew as soon as i saw it, you are so very talented love! drawing is a great distraction, i love it, nice seeing you do too sweety! 🍬
sophiegoesweird : Onew! They are amazing!:)
lisa_dar : Amazing!!
skinnyprettyperfect : Onew :o β™₯ youre amazing ^^
starving_is_so_chanel : ONEW πŸ‘Œβ€οΈ
emmythebeluga - lunemuet - piercethesamantha - _broken_butterfly_wings__ -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
I've lost my best friend, my twin, my soul mate. she was my partner in crime, my sister, my other half. I always said that she was like one of my limbs, a part of my body. she's gone. I've lost her. I'm laying on my living room floor in the dark, crying. I miss her so much. she meant everything to me. I don't know the person she had changed into. she doesn't want to come home. she doesn't want to speak to me or spend time with me. she's gone. we have been together since we were babies. she was my life. I haven't seen her in two months and I would do anything for her to come back. my little baby squid 😞
smelimeli3 : @haruki0014 stfu I said nothing but the truth
crystalwaters12 : Give it time. Things may change
xarathena : @smelimeli3 i agree in a way.
smelimeli3 : @malamiilu thanks
saaaramariaa : Tell her how you feel
thelifeofmary_ : Aw ! Everything will be ok!
sirivagberg : Same happened to me. I'm so broken. Don't know what to live for . :/ carry on <3
wannaloosesomeweight : @sweetsoapiex Talk with her! ask her whats wrong and that u miss her! If she tells u that u have made sth to her apologize and say you didn't want to!
tinylilhobo - miahowardd - emmythebeluga - piercethesamantha -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
sending snippets of love to my boyfriend. pablo neruda gives me the words that my hearts is unable to verbalise πŸ’•
beautiful - me - fashion - love - ana - tired - selfharmmm - ed - bulimia - pug - selfinjury - fat - sad - hair - anorexiarecovery - eatingdisorder - girl - edrecovery - anorexia - edsoldiers - anarecovery - recovery - mia - eatingdisorderrecovery - analesson - ednos - depressed - blithe - thin - skinny -
sweetsoapiex : #anorexia #recovery #anorexiarecovery #ana #anarecovery #ed #edrecovery #edsoldiers #eatingdisorderrecovery #eatingdisorder #sad #me #mia #bulimia #ednos #fat #analesson #girl #pug #selfharmmm #selfinjury #thin #skinny #tired #beautiful #hair #blithe #depressed #love #fashion
sweetsoapiex : heart is*
peacerecovery : I love Pablo neruda too... he was from my Country and I love his poetry<3
sweetsoapiex : @d1etcoke hehe that's so cute!! twin boyfriends πŸ™ˆπŸ˜‹πŸ’•
becomingbones_ - diaryofeatingdisorder - starving_myself_to_death - pasmakinakatya -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
I made a tumblr. I feel like I can be completely myself there. every secret depressing thought, every worry. please follow me. sweetsoapiex@tumblr.com (that's sweetsoapie with an x at the end) πŸ’•
beautiful - me - fashion - love - ana - tired - selfharmmm - ed - bulimia - pug - selfinjury - fat - sad - hair - anorexiarecovery - eatingdisorder - girl - edrecovery - anorexia - edsoldiers - anarecovery - recovery - mia - eatingdisorderrecovery - analesson - ednos - depressed - blithe - thin - skinny -
questtorecovery : @sweetsoapie found you!
legendofsiena : Thank you! @sweet_smell_of_recovery
ansleynewman : followed:) it was hard to find. I had to type it in on google but I found it :)
meganmaloney93 : I can't find you :(
rainclouds_raining_knives : @sweetsoapie I added u! Mine is youhavenotlostme :) welcome to tumblr! It's so addictive
wearewrittenonhishands : I think it should say "past" "present" @sweetsoapie
itscas_ : @sweetsoapie follow me, staystrong-perfection.tumblr.com x
starvedskeleton : @sarahbearyo Read her caption for her Tumblr
leeennyy - tassiexox - whatbraceletscanhide -
instagram
sweetsoapiex
strawberry ice cream snack with snuggles! πŸ“πŸ¦πŸΆπŸ’•
beautiful - me - fashion - love - ana - tired - selfharmmm - ed - bulimia - pug - selfinjury - fat - sad - hair - anorexiarecovery - eatingdisorder - girl - edrecovery - anorexia - edsoldiers - anarecovery - recovery - mia - eatingdisorderrecovery - analesson - ednos - depressed - blithe - thin - skinny -
naomi_bowers : It looks like the past couple of days you've done great with posting things you're eating! Proud of you and keep it up! I can see now you're fighting it 😊😊
helllohappiness : well done 🌸
sofiosaurus : Brave! You got this <3
emilyferron : You're doing lovely!
bearfossils : omg so yummy! enjoy it honey, you deserve to. β™‘ i hope you are well little bunny.
silent_destruction : Yumm😊 awh he wants some😜
elishiaahaydn : Aww yay!! Sounds lovely!!❀️✨😘
fatsnomore : @denauly SO CUTEEEE!
becomingbones_ - diaryofeatingdisorder - pasmakinakatya - crystalxxcastles -
instagram
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